Tag Archives: insight

A Bit of Perspective

PerspectiveI stared at the screen of our main PC and watched the hard drive icon disappear. It couldn’t be good by anyone’s description – and even worse as an author in the last stages of editing a manuscript.

I’d actually been trying to do the right thing by backing up the files, but apparently it was beyond the poor PC’s capacity. So I called in our local IT guru. His diagnosis, ‘So … how important were those files?’

Interestingly, when a hard drive health check was run, the computer rated itself fantastically, even though it was stuttering its way through each assessment. This got me thinking. How often do we get caught in unhealthy cycles in life, but don’t have the perspective to identify it?

You’ve probably heard mention of us knowing ourselves best. But at times, I think we can really miss it. Sometimes life just sneaks up on us and gradually we find ourselves in less than positive circumstances, not living to our potential. Other times a crisis might rock our world and, over time, we slip down a darkened road that leads to nowhere. Even if we identify non-beneficial habits, often we can’t work out quite how to change things – or even what needs changing.

As a writer I see this frequently in manuscript development. You write your heart out, read it back and revise your work, until it seems of a quality standard. Then someone, either a reader or editor, revises it and points out a minor ‘bad habit’ or plot inconsistency, and you wonder how on earth you ever missed it. Worse, you start seeing the same trait in all your work!

Just like the computer, we’re not always so great at self-diagnosis – in any area. It can be all too easy to ignore personal (or writing!) challenges, toxic habits and less than positive life choices. (Or is that just me? 🙂 ) But where does that lead us long term?

Whether it be in writing or life, we really need to built a network of trusted people in our world who have healthy insight and enough ‘care factor’ to help us stop doing wasteful loops based on a faulty self-diagnosis. These might be friends, family or wise professionals, but if we can’t think of at least two people who fit this role in our world, maybe it’s a prompt to reach out and start building new, healthy, connections.

Reaching out calls us to be brave, vulnerable, and willing to invest time and energy into that relationship. Over time, we can also become that person for someone else, building a positive way forward together.

Just Be

The empty mugs caught my eye as I flicked off the kitchen light. Hollow ceramic twins with matching tea bags hanging from the rims by an unnaturally white thread. The water in the kettle, once popping with heat, was lukewarm – evidence of multiple interruptions to my usual routine.

Those evening cups of tea represent downtime. A chance to sit with my husband, sip and just “be”. We can talk uninterrupted, catch up on our day or week, flag pending dates to note in our schedules. A day simply doesn’t feel complete without that cup-of-tea long pause.

Those abandoned mugs were a timely reminder that things don’t always turn out as we expect.

As I reader and writer, I know how conditioned we can become to expecting certain things from a story. I recently read a short inspirational work and, with some arrogance, presumed the conclusion from the first sentence. But when the focus shifted to an unexpected end point, I was actually taken aback. How did the author miss the obvious point? Instead, they’d expounded an insightful angle that I’d completely overlooked.

With such expectations engrained, like me and that cup of tea, we can become blinkered to a world of opportunities waiting for us to explore. On this occasion a child needed a bit more mummy–time than usual. Like, an hour more… But an opportunity to meet a need none-the-less.

Most of us are comfortable with routine and having things our way. But sometimes to gain fresh insight we need to be willing to look beyond our expectations and inch away from the familiar. Call it a leap of faith, if you will.

That pretty well sums up 2013. Had someone told me in January where I’d be and what I’d be doing by December, I’d have probably raised an eyebrow and offered a polite smile. Just like reading that story. You can’t be serious? I know how this will go!

Now here I am on the other side. I’ve been unsettled, challenged, and have had to let go of some things I valued highly in my world. A most unexpected insight was how much this experience rattled my identity – who I thought I was and why. What were the true pearls of value in my world; in me? Yet I’ve seen amazing provision along the journey. For each tentative, at times trembling step of faith, I’ve found a path open up before me, even when it seemed I was walking over a cliff edge.

I think the beauty of those less travelled roads is the opportunity that can be found by the wayside. Time to take on a fresh view of things – and self. The potential laced around a new direction. Even when it’s a track we’d rather flash past at highway speeds, I believe that finding ourselves meandering through grassed–over paths forces us to ease off the accelerator and let the cup of reflection rest a little longer in our hands.

Often the path seems to choose us. We may feel led, we may be dragged, but one thing I’ve learned is that there’s always purpose in the journey. Hold the cup. Draw from its warmth.

Inhale the steam of shifting expectations and just “be” for a while.

You’ll be amazed what you can see.